Sunday, September 25, 2011


I always thought when my heart broke for the first time that it wold be sudden, like the time someone threw a cement block at my passenger side window and it shattered into a thousand pieces, scattered across the front seats of my car with no hope of putting it back together. That's what I thought it would be like; but this is different. This is more like that little ding you get in your windshield, and as the temperature rises and drops, as more little stones hit your window, it gets more cracks and more dings, and eventually what started out as small crack is covering your entire windshield, spider-webbed out across the entirety of the window pane. Then all it takes is the tinniest little stress to render it useless. Finished. Done.

That's how my heart breaking feels. It's not a break, it's more like an erosion. A crumble. A heartcrumble.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011


I wish that I could show you
The me that I am now
How different I am from that girl
You left
I’m stronger now
More grounded now
I know what I want now
But I can’t have it now.

I know, it’s crazy
Most things are
But I tend to think
Just now and then
That in a different time
We would have been perfect
But I was too young
I couldn’t compete.

So now I write a letter
Or maybe even a word
About how if only
If only
It could have been wonderful.